Not Falling Apart
by mini-squint03
Summary: M/S. After their breakup; Samantha and Martin try to rebuild their relationship whilst dealing with the challenges that life presents them with.....Set in season 5, rated T just to be safe. My first fanfic!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:**Hey guys!! I suck at summaries! This is my first fanfic and first attempt at a multichapter fic so I'm sorry if the formatting is a bit off and if I'm not too great at it but hopefully I'll get better at writing it as I go along. I've kind of tweaked the storylines from the show a bit, it's set in late season five but for the sake of my story, the ambush in the season three finale never happened and Martin and Samantha never broke up. I'll be referencing things that happened in the show along the way, so if you haven't seen past season five and don't want any plot spoilers, you probably shouldn't read this. I don't have anyone proof reading this, so any spelling/grammar mistakes are completely mine. Thanks for taking the time to read this and I hope you enjoy it!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Without a Trace or any of its characters. If I did, Danny would never be wearing a shirt.

**Summary:** After their breakup; Samantha and Martin try to rebuild their relationship whilst dealing with the challenges that life presents them with.

"_It's like one step forward and two steps back_

_No matter what I do you're always mad_

_Baby I'm sorry to see maybe we're not meant to be"_

-Theory of a Deadman "Not Meant To Be"

**-March 2007-**

"I don't want to talk about it!" Sam jammed the key into her apartment door.

"Well I think we need to talk about it!" Martin pleaded with her as he followed her inside. "You can't keep shutting me out of things!" He took his jacket off and slammed it onto the couch.

"There's nothing to shut you out of! I've just had a bad day and I'm tired" Sam dropped her keys into the bowl on her hall table.

"You've had a bad day because something about this case has clearly affected you. One of the cops at the scene of Abby Horton's body said you took one look at her and took off. What happened?" Martin's voice was full of concern as he put both of his hands on her shoulders. "Talk to me" He pleaded.

"Like I said before there is nothing to talk about! Now stop asking me! She pulled both his hands off her shoulders and went into her bedroom, slamming the door in the process. It wasn't until she heard Martin flick the television onto Sports Centre that she burst into tears, knowing he wouldn't hear her. She had lied to him. Abby Horton had affected her. When she saw her body, an image came to her mind, something that she had not faced in seventeen years. A sudden flashback of the night she killed her mom's boyfriend, the night her life changed forever. She couldn't tell Martin the truth; she was afraid she would lose him forever. And for that, she cried. She knew anyway that at the rate they were going at, she was probably going to lose him anyway. And for that, she cried even more.

About an hour later, Samantha emerged from her room wearing track pants and a tank top with her hair swept up into a messy ponytail. Martin was still sitting on the sofa with his tie loosened from around his neck. The television had been turned off and he sat, staring at the black screen with a beer in one hand.

She sat down in the chair across from him. "Are you hungry? Did you want to order pizza or something?"

Martin remained quiet for a long time. Finally, he placed his beer down on the coffee table and said in a quiet controlled voice, "No, I'm not hungry. But I do want to know why my girlfriend was crying for an hour and I couldn't go in to help her."

Samantha began to say something but he continued.

"And then it occurred to me. I couldn't go in to put my arms around her and tell her it would all be okay because I have no idea what has upset her. And I realised this is because she never talks to me, never lets me in to anything that's going on inside her head. So I've been sitting here for the last forty five minutes questioning why I keep trying to force my way in when she so clearly doesn't want me."

Sam didn't want to hear this. She knew where he was going with this. She just looked at him, got up and walked into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of wine and a glass. He followed her but stopped at the door, leaning against the doorframe.

"So I've decided to stop trying. I've decided to stop everything because no matter how hard I try, I get nowhere with her." Samantha turned around but said nothing, she just stared blankly at his face.

"I can't do this anymore. I've tried with her but it's just not working!" His voice grew angrier with each word. "And it doesn't matter that I am so in love with her, that's right, so fucking in love with you Samantha, you can't seem to love me back!"

"I just…I just need more time." Tears began to roll down her cheeks for the second time in an hour.

"More time?" He asked angrily. "More time for what Sam? It has been a year! One whole year and you still don't want to move in together, you rarely come with me to visit my family, you also don't like to acknowledge the fact that we are together at work despite everyone knowing and you haven't been able to tell me that you love me even though I have been telling you for months now. What do you need more time for Sam? We have had all this time and we've gone nowhere. We're still stuck in the same place we were when we started dating and I just can't do this anymore. I can't sit around here and try to make this work when you so obviously don't want it to." And with that, he left the kitchen, grabbed his jacket and left.

Sam felt numbed. She sat down at the table and poured herself the glass of wine. She was angry at Martin for not staying but she was angrier at herself for pushing him away. She downed the wine and looked over at the sideboard, seeing her favourite framed photo of the two of them from his birthday last year. Looking at their smiling faces, Sam let the tears flow. She cried and cried and completely fell apart.

-----

Five weeks had passed since the breakup and things at work were tense to say the least. Martin had barely said a word to her since that night and it was starting to affect the team. They read into people's lives for a living. They knew a messy breakup when they saw one.

Samantha had hardly slept and drank more and more wine each night. Her friends were worried about her, particularly Danny and Elena. They were hopeful that she would eventually move on and return to her normal cheery self. Then Emily turned up.

Samantha had pretty much re-buried the memories of killing Joe. After that night two weeks ago, she hardly thought about it. She hardly thought about anything. She was already wound up enough and having Emily show up out of the blue was the last thing she wanted. After confronting her at the café and telling her she couldn't get involved with whatever Emily was going through, Sam went home. Her place was a wreck; she hadn't really done much in the way of cleaning over the last couple of weeks. She went into the kitchen to grab out another wine glass and the bottle when she saw a box on the table. On closer inspection, she found a few of her things in the box along with a note.

_Sam, _

_I just came by to return your things. I grabbed my Foo Fighters CD and spare suit on the way out. Anything else you find of mine, just throw in the bin. My key to this place is in the box too._

_Martin_

She looked in the box and found the key along with her mascara, toothbrush, tube of moisturiser and pink satin singlet. The few items highlighted her lack of prescence at his place. She didn't spend a lot of time at his place and even though they were together for over a year, they still lived quite separate lives. This was mostly her doing; she didn't want to lose her independence. She only gave him the key to her place when she was getting back on her feet after she was attacked whilst undercover on the Colleen McGrath case. She looked at the note and took in the cold and impersonal tone. It was so different, it wasn't the Martin she was used to. "Screw you" She muttered before scrunching up the note and tossing it into the bin. She went into her room, changed into a figure hugging red dress, pulled her hair up and applied some lipstick. On her way out, Sam made a promise to herself that she wouldn't stop tonight until Emily, Joe and Martin were far from her mind. And with the killer red dress on, Sam hoped to find someone to replace Martin, even just for the night.

-----

Sitting at the bar, Sam was finishing off her third martini when a voice from behind the bar asked "So what was his name?"

Sam looked up and saw a young man drying off some glasses. "What makes you think it has something to do with a guy?"  
The bartender put the glass down on the bar and threw the tea towel over his shoulder. "I'm a bartender. I'm very good at reading these things. Besides, there is no wedding ring and I rarely see a woman as beautiful as you alone in a bar drowning their sorrows in martinis unless they have recently become single."

Sam smiled and held out her hand. "Samantha Spade"

The bartender smiled back as he shook her hand. "Brian Donovan. So, did you want to order another drink and tell me all about it?"

**Please review!!! :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Thanks so much to those who reviewed!

"_The question remains, what is this for?_

_Maybe it came unexpected_

_Maybe I'm left unprotected_

_And that's the last place I want to be"_

-The Fray 'Uncertainty'

**-May 2007-**

Five weeks off from work had been exactly what Samantha needed. After she found Emily and told Jack the truth about what happened to Joe Henry, he had told her to take some time off. Even though Jack was not often too good with advice, it had been the best suggestion he had ever given her.

Sam used the time to sort herself out and move on with things that had happened over the last month. By telling Jack the truth, Sam felt freed. She had finally made peace with her past and reconciled with Emily. Sam knew that she would never be close with her mother but had at least tried to mend that bridge as well. She was also surprised to find that she had hardly thought of Martin. She wanted to go back to work and end the war with him. She also wanted to get rid of the flu that had hit her over the last couple of days.

-----

Samantha had barely gotten to her desk on her first morning back at work when Elena came rushing over, enveloping her in a hug. After they broke apart, Elena kept both her hands on Sam's shoulders. "What's up with you girlie?" Elena asked Sam; her voice filled with concern. "When people come back from time off work, they generally look better, not worse like you do." She put her hand on Sam's forehead, trying to feel for a fever. "You're not that hot but you look terrible."

Sam pulled Elena's hand off her head and put her bag down on her desk. "Thanks Elena and I missed you too." She said nasally as she sat down and took a drink from her water bottle. "I just have a flu, that's all. Nothing to be worried about." She gave Elena a reassuring smile. "What have I missed around here?"

Elena leaned up against Sam's desk. "Well, Sue in accounting is getting married…again."

Sam laughed. "Well maybe it will be third time lucky for her."

"I certainly hope so. Also, they got rid of the vending machine down the hall so there are no more quick chocolate fixes when we are stuck here late unless you want to trek all the way up to the twenty seventh floor."

"Oh god, how will we be able to cope!?" Sam mocked panic.

Elena got off Sam's desk and walked over to her own. She opened up her desk drawer and pulled out a small bag. "Lucky I managed to grab the last bag of M&M's." She walked back over to Sam and opened the bag. "There's still plenty of yellow ones in there."

Sam took one look at the bag and her face turned pale. She held her hand over her mouth and quickly turned, emptying the contents of her stomach in to the bin next to her desk.

"Oh my god! Are you alright??" Elena asked.

Sam grabbed some tissues off her desk and wiped her mouth with them. "I'm sorry; I've been like this for the last couple of days. It's just the smell of food, I can't stomach it."

Elena closed the bag of coloured candy. "Riiiight." She stated, adding at least three extra syllables to the word. "Are you sure it's the flu?" She asked suspiciously.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure. I mean, I'm vomiting, I've got headaches, I'm a bit sniffly and really tired. What else could it be?" She took a long drink of water and popped two pieces of chewing gum into her mouth.

"Um, I don't really know how to say this…um" She struggled with her words.

"What is it Elena?"

"Pregnancy." Elena blurted out.

Sam looked at her for a long moment before exploding into laughter. "You think I'm pregnant?"

Elena looked at her with all seriousness. "I'm not joking; I felt exactly the same way when I was pregnant with Sofie."

Sam grabbed some files and got up out of her chair. "I'm not pregnant Elena."

"I'm just saying, I have sort of a sixth sense with these things. I could tell when both of my cousins were pregnant before they told me. And you…"

Sam cut her off. "I'm not pregnant Elena." She said firmly. "I mean there's no way, I can't be." She said more to convince herself then Elena. As she walked away, she wondered if maybe Elena's sixth sense was in fact true.

As Sam reached the elevator, the doors opened and Martin stepped out. He mumbled something and continued past her into the hallway.

"Martin." She pleaded. He turned and looked at her. "Can we please just stop this? It's been over two months, aren't you tired of this by now? Can't we just move on?"

"Yeah." He quietly replied. He walked back to her. "So what now? I mean things were said and done, I don't know if we can go back to being friends…" He trailed off.

"Colleagues?" She suggested.

"I suppose." Martin outstretched his hand.

She shook his hand. "Colleagues it is." Their hands broke apart and an awkward silence fell upon them, only broken by the ping of the elevator door. After several agents walked out and continued up the hall, Sam hugged the files close to her chest, suddenly felling self-conscious under his eyes. "Do you think we can ever go back to being friends?" She asked quietly, her voice filled with hope.

"Maybe. One day. But for now, I think it's best if we just keep it like this. Is that okay?"

Sam felt a little crushed that he used the word 'maybe'. She really did want to regain his friendship but realistically she knew that was going to be far off. She thought at least colleagues, or co-workers would be better than enemies. "That's fine." She gave him a small smile. "Now if you'll excuse me" She flapped the files. "I have to go and drop these downstairs." She turned and pressed the down button on the elevator. The doors signalled once again as they opened and she stepped in. She pressed the floor button when she heard a soft "Samantha?"

"Yeah?" She looked up.

"Welcome back." The doors shut on Martin smiling at her.

-----

Another two days went on with Sam feeling terrible. No matter how many cold and flu tablets she took, she still didn't get better. Elena's words kept bouncing around in her head. Pregnancy. Pregnancy. Pregnancy. It was like a sing song she couldn't get rid of. So after throwing up breakfast yet again, Sam went to the chemist a few blocks away and bought three pregnancy tests. If she was pregnant, she wanted to know for sure.

Sitting on her bathroom floor, waiting for the third test to produce a result, she was nervous as hell. Shock, fear and confusion accompanied the single tear that ran down her face when she looked down at the three little sticks she was clutching in her hands. Sam had dealt with a lot of things in the 32 years she had been alive but nothing could prepare her for the three little plus signs that were about to change her life forever.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** Sorry it has been so long since my last update! I'm really trying to keep this going so I don't forget about it underneath all the other things going on right now. Thanks to PlainJaneIam for all her beta work! Enjoy!

"_We're just ordinary people_

_We don't know which way to go_

'_Cause we're ordinary people_

_Maybe we should take it slow"_

-John Legend 'Ordinary People'

**-May 2007-**

Samantha Spade hated feeling nervous. She was always calm and in control. She felt weak when she was nervous, unable to predict what will happen next. Right now, she had never felt more uneasy in her entire life. She hadn't even felt this anxious waiting for the pregnancy tests to produce a result.

It was here, in this moment where she was about to confront the father of her child. She wished that she wasn't such a sucker for a charming guy with brown hair and blue eyes. Maybe then she wouldn't be in the situation she was right now.

The morning she found out she was pregnant; she called in sick to work. Danny could tell by the tone of her voice that something was not right. After 10 incredibly long minutes of her convincing him not to come over with soup, he gave in and said he would cover for her. She really could have used some of his soup though; the man knew how to cook. Danny always joked around saying his culinary skills were his tool to seducing women.

Instead of a day at work, Sam visited the bar where she had met Brian that night. After making up some lame story about not giving a tip, she learned that he had quit after accepting a marketing job at some museum. It turned out he was only tending bars until he finished his degree in marketing and sales. She then called in a favour to an NYPD cop and asked him to search the DMV database for a thirty three year old Brian Donovan with a registered silver Festiva. When asked about her need for the information, she made up another pathetic excuse about hitting a neighbour's car on her street. It sounded like a lie as it came out of her mouth, but she wasn't about to disclose the real reasons behind her request…

-

_Sam was having no luck flagging down a taxi. It was a little after 2am. She was drunk and needed to get home and sleep, hoping to lessen the effect of the hangover she was going to have in the morning. _

"_Need a ride home?" A voice asked from behind her. _

_Even though she was near-wasted, Sam's internal alarms went off. She straight away turned around, revealing Brian standing behind her with keys in his hand. "No thanks, I'm good." She politely declined. _

"_Come on, there's no chance of you getting a cab this time of night in this area. I'll drive you." _

"_I'm sorry but I don't really know you. For all I know you could be some deranged serial killer." She was not about to get in the car with someone she met less than three hours ago. _

"_Let's get to know each other then. You already know what my name is. I'm thirty three, grew up in Boston and I'm a huge fan of Metallica. See, we're practically friends now." He smiled at her and took a step closer. _

"_I don't know." She said warily._

"_Look, that silver Festiva parked across the street there is mine. If you want, I'll drive with the passenger window all the way down so you can scream for help if I try to attack you or you don't like my radio station choice." She chuckled. "But you seem like the kind of girl who has gut instincts about people and I think that if you were suspicious of me, you wouldn't have flirted with me for the last few hours."_

_Samantha gave in. "Okay then. But the window is going all the way down and there better be some decent tunes on the radio." _

_Brian laughed "Deal."_

_He started to walk her to his car when she tripped in the gutter, falling into his arms. They both laughed and she looked up at him. "I'm only going with you because I am drunk and hoping that you are far too good looking to be a serial killer."_

_Brian helped her stand back up and guided her with his arm around her waist. "Okay then. Just so you know, I don't normally do this."_

_Sam stopped and turned so she was directly facing him. "Yeah, me either." _

_She looked into Brian's sky blue eyes and they reminded her of Martin's. It was that thing alone that allowed herself to trust this perfect stranger simply because he reminded her of someone that she trusted with her life. _

-

Sam got a contact number for Brian and called him. Without explaining too much, she had asked to meet him that night. So here she was, sitting alone in a diner booth waiting to have a conversation that would change two people's lives forever.

"Samantha?" She was snapped out of her thoughts on the events from the past few days. She looked up and saw Brian standing in front of the table.

"Brian. Um, hi." He sat down directly across from her. "Thank you for agreeing to see me on such short notice."

Brian took off his jacket and placed it down next to him. "Sure, I'm a little bit confused as to why I'm here; I was pretty shocked before when you called. How did you end up with my number?"

"I work for the FBI." An awkward silence fell upon them until a waitress came and offered them coffee. Brian took a cup and Sam politely declined, realising she could no longer drink it. After the waitress moved on to the next table, Sam continued. "I've been sitting here for the last ten minutes trying to work out how to say this, but I don't think there's going to be an easy way so…"

Brian cut in. "Don't worry, just go ahead and say it." He took a drink of his coffee.

Sam took a deep breath. "Okay fine. Brian, I'm pregnant."

He nearly spat his drink right out. "What?"

"I'm pregnant. You're the father."

He set his coffee back down on the table. "Are you really? I mean, are you sure?"

Sam blew out a puff of air thinking about the three positive tests. "Trust me, I'm sure."

Brian sat back in his seat, comprehending the news. "Okay, wow, um…"

She opened up her handbag, pulled out a piece of paper and placed it on the table between the two of them. "Look, I completely understand if you want no part in the child's life. All you have to do is sign this waiver"

He didn't let her finish. "Waiver, what?" He looked shocked.

"It basically says that you give away all your parental rights to the child, you would have no financial responsibilities" She looked around in her bag for a pen. "I think I've got a pen in here somewhere, you can sign it now and go home and forget all about it."

"Samantha, hang on a second." She looked up and saw how serious his face was. She put her bag down. "Look, we can probably both agree that this has happened in less than ideal circumstances but I can't just sign a form and have a kid walking around in the world not knowing who I am. I'm sorry Samantha but I'm not signing this." He slid the form back to her.

"Okay. Wow, that's not quite the reaction I had in mind." She was stunned at Brian's response to the pregnancy. She thought he wouldn't be able to sign the waiver fast enough.

"Well, you don't know me." He said matter-of factly. "I mean, what makes you think I would be the kind of guy who would just abandon my child?" His voice became angrier with each word. "Though it seems you've already made your mind up about me anyway."

"Hang on a minute!" She snapped back. "I haven't made my mind up about anything! You're right, I don't know you. So I had no idea how you were going to react about this whole thing. I brought the waiver with me just to be prepared in case you didn't want anything to do with the baby." She sat back in her seat and sighed. "I'm sorry, okay? It's just this last week has been insane."

"You're forgiven. I suppose I would be a bit of a mess if I was you right now too." He rubbed both of his eyes and just sat quietly. After what Samantha thought was an eternity, he asked "Where do we go from here?"

Sam sat back up in her chair and thought for a moment. Then answered, "Um, I'm not quite sure."

"Should we make a doctors appointment maybe? I mean, just to check that everything is alright? I'm not saying that there's anything wrong but just to be safe I suppose."

Sam pushed her hair behind her ears and internally cursed herself for not thinking of something like that. "Um, yeah I suppose, that would be a good idea, did you…" She paused for a moment. "Did you want to come?"

Brian smiled. "Yeah, sure. I mean, we're in this together now. I don't want to leave everything to you."

Samantha was again stunned at Brian's eagerness to be involved. "Yeah, yeah okay. I'll um, make an appointment and then call you?"

"Sounds good. Maybe we could go for coffee afterwards and maybe start getting to know each other a little better?" He stopped and quickly added "If that's what you want, I don't want to force anything upon you."

"No that sounds good. It's probably smart that we get to know each other. As friends." She put emphasis on the word 'friends' just to make sure that Brian knew that's how things were going to be between them.

He got up out of his chair and pulled a few notes out of his pocket and placed them on the table next to his coffee cup. "Although I suppose you won't be able to have any coffee now." He said with a bit of a teasing tone.

Sam got up as well. "Yeah don't remind me." She groaned.

"That's okay. Girls like chocolate right?"

She chuckled. "Girls _love_ chocolate."

"I'll buy you a hot chocolate then." Brian went to shake her hand but they realised it was strange for the situation they were in so he pulled her into an awkward hug. They broke apart. "So you'll call me in a couple of days?" He asked whilst putting on his jacket.

"Yeah I will." She grabbed her handbag.

Brian turned to walk away. "Hey Brian?" She asked.

"Yeah?"

"Thankyou for being so…I don't know, just so cool about the whole situation."

He smiled. "You're welcome. And Sam, don't worry about all of this okay? We'll face whatever comes along one step at a time."

As he walked away, Sam was overcome with relief, although there was still a little part deep down inside of her that was on edge. She was glad that Brian was accepting of the situation now, but she wondered if he would still be as enthusiastic later down the road.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** I'm so sorry I've taken so long to update! Life gets busy...I really envy those who can keep on top of their stories. Once again, thanks to PlainJaneIam for all her great beta work, this chapter whould not have worked without her :)

"_And I hope one day you'll see_

_Nobody has it easy_

_I still can't believe you found somebody new_

_But I wish you the best…I guess"_

-John Legend "Everybody Knows"

**-June 2007-**

"Hey hot stuff" Sam looked up from her computer screen and saw Danny and Elena both standing behind her desk with pleased looks on their faces.

"What's up? Did you get those pay phone records?"

"No this is about something else." Danny said with a huge grin on his face.

Sam looked around to check that there was no one nearby. "You guys need to stop looking at me with those goofy grins on your faces; people are going to wonder what's going on." She said in a hushed voice.

She had told them about the pregnancy over a week ago and ever since then they would become overly excited anytime they were near her. She was thankful that her best friends were supportive, but she hadn't told anyone else at work yet, not even Jack and she hoped that one of them wouldn't let it slip. Someone was bound to catch on soon as both of them were elated and extra attentive to her. Sam knew that expecting mothers supposedly had a glow about them but no-one had ever told her about the glow spreading to the mother's best friends.

Elena quietly said "I'm sorry, but we have something for you. Well actually, it's for her."

"Or him." Danny cut in. He pulled up a small gift bag and gave it to Sam.

She opened the bag and pulled the yellow tissue paper aside. Her eyes lit up when she saw a little two piece set with giraffes on them. "Guys, thank you so much but you didn't have to do this."

Elena smiled. "Don't worry about it. We were at the zoo with Sofie the other day and saw it in the gift shop. I just thought it was so cute and since Sofie has obviously outgrown these things we thought we would get it for you." Sam mouthed the words 'thankyou' to the two of them and slipped the outfit into the bag before placing it in her desk drawer for safe keeping and away from the wandering eye of the other agents.

"But trust me." Danny added. "This won't be the end of it. This baby will be spoiled rotten by Uncle Danny."

"And Aunt Elena." The Latina agent added with a chuckle. "Doesn't that just have a ring to it?"

"Yeah." He agreed. "But not as cool as Uncle Danny." The three of them laughed.

"Seriously guys. Thank you so much for everything." She got up out of her seat and gave Danny a hug and kiss, releasing him as his cell phone rang. She turned and enveloped Elena in a hug.

"Seriously though." Elena whispered in her ear mid-hug. "It was Danny who was going nuts over all the baby clothes, he couldn't contain himself. Anyone would think he was the one having the baby." They both laughed.

"What's so funny?" He asked, hanging up the phone.

"Nothing." They replied at the same time.

Danny looked at them suspiciously. "Hm. Well, sorry to cut this short but we have to roll. They just bought Susan Connelly's husband back in for questioning."

"Do you need help with those records when they come in?" Elena asked.

Sam sat back down at her desk. "No it's alright. I'll get Martin or Viv to help me."

"Martin's been with Mac and Lucy all morning helping sort through the security footage from outside Susan's office, so you'll probably have to get Vivian when she comes back in." Danny said as he grabbed some files off his desk. "Elena, come on." He said practically dragging her by the shirt. "You can beam later."

Sam turned back to her computer. After a few moments of working, she paused and opened her desk draw, pulling out Elena's salvaged bag of M&M's. As she was about to close the drawer, she looked at the baby's gift. She thought for a moment about Danny and Elena's overwhelming response to her pregnancy along with Brian's support. He had been nothing but attentive at the doctor's appointment the previous week and really sweet at the café afterwards. They had talked for nearly two hours but a small part of her was worried about his long term commitment. Everyone was in high spirits about the pregnancy. Everyone but her. She did want the baby; she knew that but there was still something inside of her that was preventing her from being happy. She closed the drawer and looked over at Martin's desk, knowing exactly what was missing.

Her feelings aside, she resumed searching through the missing teacher's emails before hearing a soft voice call her name. "Agent Spade?" [cut some extra words out]

She swivelled in her chair to find Bonnie, the young receptionist behind her. She smiled. "Yes Bonnie? And please, it's Samantha."

"Sorry, Samantha. I was wondering if Agent Fitzgerald was around? There's a woman here to see him."

Instantly she was curious as to who this woman was. "He's with Mac and Lucy at the moment, but I'll call him. You can send her through."

"Thanks."

Sam turned in her chair and dialled the tech room from her desk phone. As it dialled, she poured out the M&M's onto her desk and started weeding out the yellow ones. Mac answered the phone and Sam asked if Martin could come to the bullpen for a moment. After hearing his reply, she hung up the phone and scooped up the little yellow chocolates.

"Excuse me?" The voice startled Sam which caused her to drop the M&M's, sending yellow beads flying across the floor.

"Crap!" She leapt out of her seat after the M&M's.

"Oh god! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to scare you." The woman knelt down and helped the startled blonde recover the dropped candies. The petite brunette scooped them up and handed them to Sam who already had a handful. She put them into a pile on her desk and got back to her feet.

"Thanks." Sam said as she brushed off her pants.

The woman held out her hand. "I'm Jennifer Stevens."

Smiling, she shook it. "Hi Jennifer, I'm Samantha. And you don't have to apologise, I've been all over the place today."

Sam took a moment to observe Jennifer. She was wearing a white blouse with a grey skirt along with black heels. She had perfect hair, makeup, nails, everything. There wasn't a thing out of place. Sam thought about her own appearance and what she must look like. The day was warm, so she had rolled her shirt sleeves up and thrown her hair up into a messy ponytail whilst she was working. Blonde strands had started to fall down around her face and her hands had yellow stains on them from where the M&M's had started to melt. Compared to Jennifer, she was a wreck. She suddenly felt self conscious next to Jennifer so she sat down in her chair and folded her arms.

"So you were here to see Agent Fitzgerald?" She asked.

"Yeah, we were supposed to meet for lunch but Marty called and said he would be running a bit late so I came up here to wait for him." Sam instantly felt sick when she heard his nickname roll off her tongue so casually. They were clearly more than friends.

"Yeah, he's just finishing up with our techies; he should be out in a minute. Take a seat." Sam gestured to a seat at the main table. Jennifer sat down and crossed her legs, placing her hands in her lap. "So, how long have you and Martin been seeing each other?" She knew she had no right to ask, but for some reason she needed to know.

"Around a month." Jennifer replied.

"Wow, a month." Sam felt like she had been punched in the gut. She didn't think Martin would move on so quickly after their break up. She forced a smile. "That's great, he's a great guy."

"Yeah, he is great."

"Talking about me?" Martin approached the bullpen, the two women rising from their seats upon his arrival. "Maybe." Jennifer said with a flirty tone. She hugged Martin and he kissed her cheek. Witnessing the exchange, Sam wished she was anywhere else but in her current position.

"I hope you weren't waiting too long." He said as he grabbed his jacket from his chair.

"No it's fine. Samantha was keeping me company." Jennifer replied. "Where do you want to go for lunch?"

Martin put his jacket on. "Not sure, you decide." He looked down and saw something yellow on the ground. "Why is there an M&M on the ground?"

Sam raised her hand. "My bad, I had a bit of a clumsy moment before."

Martin chuckled. "Watch out next time. See you soon." He threw his arm around Jennifer's shoulders, and they began to walk out.

"It was nice meeting you." Jennifer tossed over her shoulder. Martin whispered something in her ear and she giggled.

"Nice to meet you too." Sam said flatly when she knew the pair was out of earshot.

Jennifer seemed like a lovely person. Sam knew it was wrong to have an instant irrational dislike for the woman without knowing her, but there was something about Jennifer that just annoyed her. Maybe it was the way she was so perfect from the way she looked to the way she sat, or maybe it was just the fact that Jennifer was with the guy that she was clearly not over. She didn't even think that Jennifer was Martin's type.

-

"_Is that really you?" Sam asked as she showed him the photo. They had spent the afternoon looking through a box of his old photos and she had come across one from his high school days. The photo showed a much younger Martin standing in front of the bleachers with his arms around a young girl of the same age wearing a cheerleader's outfit. _

_He put his arm around her waist and leaned in to see the photo. "Better believe it."_

"_You were cute." She gave him a quick kiss. "You still are."_

"_Don't forget it." He said._

"_Who's the girl?" She asked, referring to the blonde in the photo._

_Martin stretched his legs out on the bed. "That would be Tiffany Moore."_

"_Was she your girlfriend?" Sam teased._

"_Yes she was." He replied._

"_Oooh, Martin and Tiffany, sitting in a tree." She sing-songed. _

"_Real mature Sam." They both laughed. _

_Sam looked back at the photo. "She's very pretty."_

"_Yeah she was." Martin agreed. "It was my final year of high school, and I was captain of the football team. She was a cheerleader. It was a match made in high school heaven."_

_Sam smiled. "What happened?" She asked._

"_We went to different colleges; long distance didn't really work out. But I learned from a very young age that I had a thing for feisty blondes."_

"_Oh." Sam said, elongating the 'O' sound. "So you're saying that I'm you're type."_

_He pulled her onto his lap and kissed her. "You're exactly my type."_

-

His type or not, Jennifer seemed good for Martin; she probably wanted the big house, the kids, the golden retriever, and the white picket fence. Sam knew she should be happy for Martin, especially after the things that she put him through. Then why did she feel so upset that he was moving on?


End file.
